"nuqDaq 'oH puchpa''e'?"

In the vast wasteland of things to watch on Netflix, there are some gems. There are also some things on there I would not waste a second watching. The fun in is the search. Trying to find the one you want to binge a little, but also prolong - have as a go-to before saying "Good night" to the Sandman.

So, I was perusing for something to watch and saw... "Star Trek". The original series. It suddenly dawned on me that I may have to turn in my Geek Card...

I knew of the classic episodes, "Space Seed", "Mirror Mirror", and "The Trouble With Tribbles". I had seen the motion pictures on cable. I remember a two week stint in Biloxi, Mississippi, 6th or 7th grade, where "Wrath of Khan" was playing five times a day on cable.

I watched the premiere of "The Next Generation" back in the 80's... I understood the parody references on "In Living Color" and "Saturday Night Live" and was secure in my knowledge of that universe.

As I selected the show on Netflix, it occurred to me: I have never, EVER watched a single episode of the seventy nine that comprised the original series. I was also struck by another fact as I was about half way through the second season.

Man, did this show suck.

NOTE: On Netflix, they are playing the "remastered" versions. In 2006 CBS devoted some resources and basically added new computer generated graphics to the shows... Adding backgrounds to planets and making the Enterprise look bad ass in space. So, when I say, "Man, did this show suck." I am not even referring to the special effects of the late 60's.

The show, airing from 1966 to 1969, had three seasons. It did not really become a "hit" until it hit syndication. That, in and of itself, is a very weird phenomenon. A show usually has to hit one hundred episodes to be considered for syndication. That is why shows make a big deal about hitting "100".

There were four plot lines. Seriously. That is it.

1) God like Power - Some "entity" has control. It is a threat to a species or the Enterprise. "Oh noes. What ever shall we do???"

"Let's use the anti-matter/dilythium crystals/phasers to reverse the polarity."

Let's not discover that til the last five minutes, then we will gather around the Captain's chair and bust Spock's Vulcan nuts for a bit. Roll credits!

2) Space Madness - Oops... Flew through a cloud in space. Chekov's being a little bitch about it... Need an antidote... But let's wait to discover that formula til the third act. It wasn't until the second season they incorporated the "chuckle bit" at the end.

3) Territory Dispute - Galactic pissing war. This alien claims this space as theirs... Kirk fucks a chick and then beams on out (Kirk invented GHOSTING!) Oh, in this one, Spock will tell the Captain to not do something... Guess what the Captain does?

At the end, you guessed it... "Hey, Spock, you are not human!". Would have killed to hear. just once, Spock say "Damn skippy, Bitches."

4) Time Travel/Alternative Earth - These guys were time travelling all the time! If they were not time travelling, they were beaming down to a planet that somehow... remarkably... against billions to one odds developed like Earth... BUT WITH A TWIST!

Let's see... There was a Mafia planet, a Hippie planet, a Native American planet... A planet where the American Constitution was written just like ours... They went back to 1968... twice. I can't remember if it was a Nazi planet or they time-traveled to Nazi Germany... And I really could give a shit...

And the cross plot line winner... A God like Power transported Kirk and the Gang to the OK Corral! Western!!! ("Spectre of The Gun", Season 3, Episode 6. Geek Card FIRMLY IN HAND!)

When I informed my Moms that I was watching the series, and my acknowledgment of it's suckitude, she first said, "You must really be hard up for something to watch...", and then informed my of how my Dad was GLUED to the show back in the day.

After watching, I understood...  *cough*click here*cough*

There was some scantily clad females wondering around space! An episode was putting me to sleep once... then Angelique Pettyjohn comes strutting through in an outfit that would make LeeLo from "The Fifth Element" say. "I bet that's chilly as hell!"

Mom also informed me of the television landscape at the time. Variety shows, like Ed Sullivan, and Westerns. That was it... Some sitcoms sprinkled in... the News, back when they actually reported "happenings that had an impact on your life."

So, this was something different. Something fresh. Something unique. And chicks in short skirts and sarongs... Hells. Yes.

I guess that was the answer to my question... "How did a show that sucked this bad go to Cultural Staple???" There was a show on the TV Guide Network, called "25 Biggest TV Blunders" and the cancellation of "Star Trek" ranked FOURTH!

Context is the lubricant of understanding.

They had a Russian on the bridge in the late 60's!!! A damn dirty Ruskie!!! Oh, but that must mean that our stupid Cold War with the U.S.S.R. eventually was shown to be just that... Stupid.

Uhura and Kirk kissed! A black woman and a white man kissed. On TV. In prime time. Funny thing... The ship did not blow up... But that was only because Scotty saved the day... at the last possible second... And then they all gave Spock shit again... (I am guessing... That episode, "Plato's Stepchildren" is up next in the queue.)

Nichelle Nichols, playing Lt. Uhura, thought about leaving the show after the first season. She was personally asked by Dr, Martin Luther King Jr. to stick with the show. She was one of the first black women on TV not in the role of a servant. She was too important. She was too inspirational.

So was the show... I doubt many of the "pillars" of science fiction would exist without the five year mission of the starship Enterprise.

I do not doubt George Lucas ("Star Wars") could throw a Vulcan salute with the best of them.

I am sure Douglas Adams ("Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy") thought about sticking his thumb out and catching a ride on the Enterprise.

Joss Whedon ("Firefly") took notes about crew camaraderie... but scaled back on the cheesiness... at times...

And without "Star Trek", there would be no "Galaxy Quest". Case closed.

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The show, and Gene Roddenberry in particular, gave a vision. A vision where when confronted with a new alien race, we did not shit ourselves with fear... But came in peace... and offered friendship and inclusion, to mutually benefit both parties.

It was a vision of a future where we got the hell out of our own way. One where we, as a RACE, a HUMAN RACE, worked together to kindle that explorer's spirit. Yes, to boldly go. We rarely "boldly go" anywhere anymore... And the only reason we did bold'y go was because we were inspired... By a show that sucked. Okay... "kinda" sucked.

Live long and something something,

d

Personal note: In the last 30 days or so, my posts were hit 2100 times or so. So... Thanks for reading. I do hope you smiled once. Part of me hopes you shook your head. Really... You all have so many avenues in which to waste your time, thanks for wasting away with me! Oh.... Google the title.

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