An autistic girl was explaining her condition, and brought up the concept of "normalcy".
She summed it up quite nicely with a question, "What if the greatest compliment you ever received was, 'You are really normal!'?"
There are a few things I have been accused of... "Normal" is not towards the top of the list.
My mind does NOT work like yours (You should really, really be thankful for this). Your mind does not work like your siblings. Their minds do not work like their teachers... So on and so forth... This is a GOOD thing.
This is what propels us forward as a species on this little rock. If we all thought the same, we would be a hive... A colony of ants.
This could be a huge reason of why I am so anti-religion. Atheism is a by-product of that... I am against a group of people, instructed and overseen by a sheepherder, who is flawed and human as well, who tells them they are the only ones who have it "right". They are the "normal" ones. This, by default, means I am abnormal. "Heathen", if you please.
The desire of acceptance is honed and brought sharply into focus in the school system. It is truly many peoples first social interaction on a large scale, without the familial bond. No one wants to be the last one picked for whatever team endeavor. No one enjoys being ostracized (For the record... I am quite happy I spelled that correctly first attempt... Just saying,,,) by their "peers".
Ah... "peers"... The quotes are there for a reason. Why do we put people above us? Please understand, I am using the royal "we"... Having moved around a bit, I was pretty self-reliant and had no problem making friends. Mainly because I learned early on that people usually suck a bag of dicks.
Do we long for inclusion to that "group" because if we do get let in, we are "normal"?
The popularity of the X-Men (comics, as the movies have been a steaming pile. Seeen better film on teeth.) was that it touched on that point... If you are a mutant, different... abnormal, there is a place you can have the sense of truly belonging... An accepting community... A safe, non-judgmental haven.
Do we envision that these people's lives are so shit hot and that they are so together, that by being embraced, we too are shit hot and together?
I learned quite a lot at the 20 year high school reunion... People who I had hardly interacted with, or was a fringe member of their clique, told me that they wish we had hung out more... Um... I was RIGHT THERE!!!! It could have been the anti-social attitude I worked so hard at...
I also learned that the people that I thought were on top of things, were, in fact, hanging by a solitary, precarious thread... As a wise man once said... "High school is the bottom, being a teenager sucks, but that's the point, surviving it is the whole point. Quitting is not going to make you stronger, living will. So just hang on and hang in there."
At the reunion, I also learned that a man can urinate on 8 parked cars in a row if the wind is in his favor. Toby wins.
"Societal norms" and normalcy are not the same thing... Being able to function in society is the mask we all wear. I have to sometimes interact with a person from the IT... She has the warmth of two day old polar bear shit. A co-worker and I have mused about her after hours activities... Leather was a predominant theme.
We are have the thoughts that make us stop and think, "I am completely deranged... That was NOT normal...", when I have them... it usually ends up on this blog thingy... Stephen King has made a not so small fortune by entertaining the thoughts that others rapidly shoo away. He is abnormal as all hell, and I for one, am quite thankful.
You can have normal facets to your life. I highly recommend it. I just think it is important to celebrate the quirky, non-comfy, off-putting facets that make you inescapably you.
I know a businesswoman... She is really young, smart, and very disciplined. She has a damn good head on her shoulders and is waaaaaaaaaay ahead of the game compared to me at 22 years old. I was taking refuge in the USAF at that time. Her occupation as a dominatrix is what some would call "abnormal". Her attitude towards those who summarily judge her, has a nice bouquet of "Fuck off if you have an issue with it. Thatt is YOUR issue."
I find our conversations quite fascinating. Mainly because they rarely stay within the realm of "normal". I can speak with co-workers and it will be pleasant, socially acceptable... and BANAL!!!!
Topics at work:
1) Football... The refs are for or against INSERT TEAM here.
2) If gas prices go up, it is Obama's fault, and now that they are down, "The president does not control THAT!"
2a) "I am not racist, but how can I hate our president without it sounding that way?" (You can't!)
3) Kids are good/bad/costly.
4) Some stupid person on a stupid reality show said WHAT?
5) INSERT MINORITY HERE. (Under clever subtext, mind you)
Insert both barrels, hook the toe in the trigger, and pull a Cobain!
The lunchroom gets fun when I "pop" in... Because I am not "normal". I will play devil's advocate just to make a person think about the completely asinine thingy that just emerged out of their word hole.
I did not say "re-think about" because I am pretty convinced that Fox "News" has ate some of their brains whole and replaced them with the shit that comes out the other end. Independent thought and they parted ways a long, long time ago. Open head, insert "bumper sticker" mentality.
So... The question that emerges... When does "X" cross the line from "normal" to "abnormal"? That is a deeply personal and individual determination. My threshold of abnormality is probably greater than most.
If you were to describe a sexual act steeped in depravity... and declare it abnormal, I am probably thinking, "Ya know... If we did that in the Vatican, that would really do it for me... Yes... I will wear the papal tiara."
I remember a study saying that something like 52% of families are "dysfunctional"... Would that then make them the "norm"? If you came from a loving, supportive, and nurturing family... YOU are the fucking freak!!!!
Weirdly, I came from a super loving, super supportive, super nurturing family... STILL a fucking freak. I get to live in my head 24/7/365. You peeps are getting a smidge of what goes on in there. All this... still the censored version...
_____________________
Being called "normal" is not a complete compliment... Nor is it a full on insult. It just means your mask fits nice and snug.
And yes... it is an enormous schwanzstucker,
d
This blog brought to yo by 10CC, Iron Maiden, D.R.I., Robert Plant + Alison Krauss, Atari Teenage Riot + Slayer, Steve Vai, Aerosmith, The Beatles, Alice In Chains, Rush, SeatBelts, The Doobie Brothers, Slaughter ("Fly to The Angels" was cool... shaddup!), Sublime, REO Speedwagon, Guns N' Roses, and Liz Phair.
This week's suggested course material: Watch "Young Frankenstein"
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